Skip to main content

July 7, 2022 | Serena's diary

  I love my Xandy, but he can be so silly sometimes! I hope he loves me, I do, it's just... why doesn't he ask me out? My friends and I thought, okay, not every guy is into anal, so maybe he won't want to sleep with me, but maybe we could do something intimate that isn't necessarily sexual, like dancing. So Faus suggested dancing, but that made Xander freeze up as well! He agreed to it, but... oh, why couldn't he just ask me himself?

On top of that, this girl Syria showed up interested in my Lucifer. She's not really his type, but he'll be polite, anyway. He told Rebecca, months ago, that he wasn't looking for a girlfriend.

Syria approached us much the same way as Freya: shy, polite, claiming she doesn't want to disrupt anything. I'm indifferent to her as a person, but I don't really want Luci to be distracted by her when he could be needed by me. Because what if Xander's just being polite so I won't fight with him? The look Syria gave me, like she was trying to figure me out, was yet another bone-chilling reminder that I'm not exactly what Xander was looking for in a mate.

How long am I going to feel like this, frightened and insecure? He wanted Maze instantly. He wanted that girl from his past, Wren, instantly. He didn't hesitate to propose to either of them. So why can't he at least ask me out?

I don't understand him. He balked at whitewater rafting and at dancing. Is there anything he likes, besides pussy?

I hate how bitter I am. This isn't me. I just want to be loved and needed by him. He's so reserved with me in a way he wasn't with his other girlfriends, at least as far as I know. I hate that I'm once again crying over him. I thought things were good between us, and we both desperately want them to be, but... but...

I really don't know. Am I just impossible to satisfy?

Sometimes I wish I could just forget the last 16 years and just be carefree again.

At the risk of beating a dead horse, my friends and I suggested two fun activities and pitched getting a separate legal identity for Serena so I could marry Xander without divorcing Luci. Why doesn't he get it? I hate to keep asking, but doesn't he love me?

Doesn't he love me?

Doesn't he love me?

He didn't feed, again, and I don't understand why he neglects us so.

...

Doesn't he love me?

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

April 18th, 2024; 3:04 a.m. | Banter with Ni and Airy

"Omg I'm just going to be straight up right now" Miles with a hand on his hip.  "The next person to confess their love for Lyle is getting their fingers chopped off and fed to them. Like what do you think he'll actually be into you over me?!! As if!!! Take six steps back girlfriend and find a different dick to hop on ..... Even tho he totally invited you!! But like he didn't really, he WOULDN'T DO THAT!!!"  Miles straight even moving his head a bit snotty tv girl movie like before snapping his fingers three times at the end   Lyle "Ok stop that .... I'm actually weirded out now....."   Miles "Told you I could do it better mother fucker!!"   "Manliest shit I've seen all week!" Z-Dog busting up laughing   Lyle "Oorah!"   NI // ...... Your welcome. MANLY//   RENO // STOP I CAN'T BREATHE   NI //GOOD..... Cause me neither   RENO // This has the energy of Tr...
Post a Comment
Read more

October 8, 2024 | Trent as Hannibal's patient

  “How does it make me 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘭 ? Are you fucking serious right now? This is what I’m paying for from an internationally-renowned psychiatrist?” Trent ranted, pacing the tastefully-furnished office and running a hand through his sleek bronze hair. “My marriage ended before it even began because my fiancée was jealous of my best friend. My other best friend was brainwashed into marrying this guy who’s jealous of 𝘮𝘦 . I had an actual social group for the first time in my life and we went from being a fun group of friends to probably THE most toxic couple-versus-couple, oh and let me just add that most of the people in the couples don’t even 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 each other! Let’s see. Faustus resents that he’s been blackmailed on pain of death to marry his wife. Nathaniel hates how controlling George has become. I loved Rebecca to death, almost literally, but I’ve had to face up to the fact that that girl is a mess, which 𝘤𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 lead us to Serena’s situation—Sebastian’s situation? I don’t k...
Post a Comment
Read more

October 21, 2022 | Wren x Serena – “It’s been a week….”

 (Wren) "It's been a week, shall I commence too fear for my life again?" The blonde asked nervously to nobody as she looked fearfully over her shoulder.   Serena kicked down a ceiling tile and peeked down like Ceiling Cat. "YIPPEE KI YAY, MOTHERFUCKER!" she crowed. She took out her twin micro SMGs, held them stupidly (like Dante from DMC), and sprayed bullets throughout the room haphazardly!   "SHOOT!" Wren cried but it only seemed to encourage the other as the bullets kept flying! She tucked for cover, managing to avoid the worst of it, but her HOUSE! Who was going to pay for all these repairs! Should she run outside or try to stay hidden? The furniture could only provide so much cover for so long! She was dead, she was dead, she was DEAD, and for what? What did this girl have against her anyhow?   Serena jumped down from the ceiling, nailing her three-point landing, and proceeded to search through the bullet-ridden domain for Wren. She didn't kno...
Post a Comment
Read more